schnoobus's Xanga

The customer is sometimes full of shit.

Fri, 05 Dec 2008 15:10:37 GMT

Ever heard the saying 'the customer is always right'? Whoever came up with that stupid adage obviously didn't work in retail. Although today was my last day as a checkout chick (perhaps) and that I should probably write something that's positive and optimistic, I've decided instead to write something that's colourful, maybe a little bit bitter, but altogether honest. I remember most of the customers who were assholes to me, or just assholes in general. Maybe they were having a bad day. Maybe their dog died. Maybe they got dumped. Whatever, I don't really care if the first thing you play is the 'dickhead' card.

Top 5 list of irritated checkout chicks:

5. After scanning everything, they decide they don't want something that was the very first thing I scanned, hence the necessity to erase everything and start scanning all over again. And then they decide they don't want something else.

4.Asking 'how much is that? It's supposed to be on special' after every item is scanned. It's on the screen, people!

3.People who think the EFTPOS/credit card machine breaking down is somehow my fault and hold it against me for its malfunction. Right, because I told the machine to break. For kicks.

2.People who give attitude when asked to check their bags:

For example -
Buffoon #1: 'Oh yeah, I steal HEAPS of shit.' And you are so eloquent while being a thieving twat!
Buffoon #2: 'Are you customs? If you're not customs, you're not allowed to check my bag.' See that bright red sign there? That 'Conditions of Entry' sign? Yeah. That one. It says I can check your bag the minute your foot steps inside the store. Learn how to read.

1. DO NOT THROW YOUR MONEY AT ME. Learn some manners, please!

I haven't come across a customer who has performed all 5 of these atrocities. I hope such a fiend doesn't exist, for the sake of checkout chicks everywhere.

You know, now that you've got me started, there are probably more. I could probably make a top 7 list or a top 9 list. 10's kind of pushing it and it'll make me look misanthropic. Which I'm not. Because there are some really nice customers who strike a much needed balance in the world of checkout chick-dom. I would say ratio's about 30:50:20 (nice ones:normal ones:assholes). And most of the time, the kids are cute.

So next time you're in the supermarket, spare a thought for the poor person on the other side of the counter who endures countless abuse from angry people everywhere. Unless they give you 'tude first. Then feel free to hand it back with a side of 'bitch'. Because that's what I would be tempted to do.

Winner Takes it All

Thu, 30 Oct 2008 14:52:18 GMT

I feel like I'm at one of those rare places in life where you have all these choices laid out for you, like a deck of cards, and all you have to do is choose. Just pick a card. Any card. But I'm stuck. I don't know what choice to make. I want to make the right one, but I don't know if I will or not. Will I win?

How many times do we say 'I don't know' in our lives? How many times is its importance rippled? This is one of those times, isn't it. I look at everyone around me, and everyone seems to know what to do with their lives. I want to be one of those people. I'm just not quite sure how. And I think I know what I want to do. But I also don't know how to get there. My map has been smudged in the rain.

And how do you know which people will play the keystones in your life? How do you know if you haven't been running with a lamb who has been a wolf all this time? Or perhaps shunning a wolf who is really a lamb? Instinct tells me to take a chance on people, that all it takes is an outstretched arm to get to that next bough. But it feels so far away. And maybe, I'm a little bit afraid.

Remember when...

Thu, 14 Aug 2008 13:17:08 GMT

It often amazes me how good my mum's memory is. It's freakishly good. For example, she can remember the exact day she left for London something like 30 years ago. Like it's another child's birthday or something. She even remembers my friends' birthdays, and even then, it was only because I said 'I'm going to so and so's party, his/her birthday's today.' I'm notoriously bad at remembering birthdays, and I apologise, and will continue to apologise for this for the rest of my life. SORRY! I often wonder why her superpower wasn't passed on to me. In fact, I think the opposite effect happened. My mum's memory is so good, that to make up for having 'remembering skills' in excess, whoever decides these things up there decided to shortchange me. I mean I'm pretty thankful that I do have some semblance of short term and long term memory, but I do often wonder where all those things that I used to know in my head went.

Case in point #1: (something I'm pretty sure won't shock many) I'm really horrendously bad at maths. This includes forgetting an embarassing amount of times tables that my dad tried to knock into me so hard when I was at that crucial age when learning maths was compulsory. (I know, when?)

Case in point #2: I've forgotten stuff I learnt in 1st year uni. I can say I've read and been examined on texts like Hero & Leander, Heart of Darkness, and The Red Badge of Courage, and yet, I remember shockingly little from them. I remember liking Hero and Leander too. I guess liking something isn't a prerequisite for remembering its contents.

Case in point #3: I watched this French film last semester called Human Resources. Comfortingly, I do remember what it's about in pretty good detail, BUT, not very comfortingly, I can't remember the director's name. I mean, I wrote part of a 3000 word, 60% essay on this. HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE. The only explanation is that my memory is abnormally bad. My track record for my lousy memory never ceases to disappoint and amaze. After referring to the wonder that is google, my memory has been refreshed. That guy's name is Laurent Cantet.

I'm pretty sure I could move on to Case in point #very large number, but I think I've embarassed myself enough for one night.

I bid you all adieu, until my next moment of self deprecation.

Dear Friend,

Wed, 30 Jul 2008 11:25:11 GMT

I was reading a book the other day, where one of the protagonists has some sort of obsession with handwriting. Of course, this obsession with handwriting was a convenient avenue for plot development, but besides that, I found it a rather intriguing thought. I admit I'm one of those people who find sentimental value in things, oftentimes giving others the impression that I never throw anything away. Wrong! I throw away that which doesn't mean anything to me. But, like this sap I was reading about a few days ago, I keep a box of handwritten articles because to me, they are more than just words. They are the thoughts, the feelings, the memories of those people who wrote them, and I find it a privilege that they chose to share them with me.

In a world where technology reigns, where it is easier and faster to use a machine to express yourself (as, ironically, I am doing now) the act of writing something down is expression in one of its purest forms. Your handwriting is thus your own, irreproducible stamp, something no one else can recreate with their own hand, just as you cannot recreate theirs. Perhaps there is something comforting in the thought that in our society, where it is so easy to look and to act like everyone else, something as simple as your own handwriting can provide some sort of a marker of identity, of being the only one of its kind in the world. Handwriting adds authenticity, conviction to words. What are left of words without the life in them? They cease to be meaningful, but remain only as empty vessels. Think about every letter, every postcard, every birthday card, every hasty note ever written to you. What would they be if they were all in Times New Roman? How much character would they have left? A lot less than if they were in someone's chicken scratches, or neat print, or haphazard scrawl.

So even if I don't talk to that person anymore, or if I happen to see them everyday, I still keep those little bits of paper, those hints of personality. But always, they stay as reminders of my connection to other people in this world.

Friday, May 02, 2008

Fri, 02 May 2008 16:12:22 GMT

I was going to write about something proper...but I got distracted. And tagged.

Rules:
1. The rules of the game get posted at the beginning.
2. Each player answers the questions about themselves.
3. At the end of the post the player then tags 5 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves a comment, letting them know they got tagged and to ask them to play and read your blog.

Starting time: 2:31am
Name: June
Sisters: 0
Brothers: 2
Shoe size: 5
Height: PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL!
Where do you live: Sydney
Favourite drinks: Water, Tea
Favourite breakfast: Not a big breakfast person. Mostly because it doesn't agree with my timing.
Have you ever been on a plane: Hells yeah.
Swam in the ocean: Yeah. Don't know if that was a smart thing to do or not.
Fallen asleep in school: Hahahahaha. Yeah. No brainer.
Broken someone's heart: Don't think so?
Fell off your chair: Hahahahaha. Also yes.
Sat by the phone all night waiting for someone to call: Yeah? Sort of pathetic. But yeah.
Saved e-mails: Yes indeedy.
What is your room like: Cosy, and a room version of me? Like my personality threw up in a room.
What's right beside you: Joy's bed. And Joy. One to the left to the right, one to the right.
What is the last thing you ate: Chocolate Chip cookies.
Ever had chicken pox: When I was 6.
Sore throat: What normal person hasn't?
Stitches: Yes.... I was a clumsy child, and am now a clumsy person.
Broken nose: No...and I hope never to...I've heard they hurt a whole lot.
Do you believe in love at first sight: No
Like picnics: Yes
Who was the last person you danced with: Joy and Yihong
Last made you smile: Joy
You last yelled at: My brother
Today did you talk to someone you like: I'm not a misanthropist, so yes.
Kissed anyone: Yes
Get sick: Yes
Talked to an ex: Not for a longggg time.
Miss someone: Every day.
Eat: I'm not sure I understand this question properly?? But YEAH?!
Best feeling in the world: The feeling is different for every person.
Do you sleep with stuffed animals: Yes. And I make no bones about it.
What's under your bed: Carpet
Who do you really hate: Narrow minded people.
What time is it now: 2:43am

Randoms :
Q: Is there a person who is on your mind right now: Not particularly
Q: Do you have any siblings: 2
Q: Do you want children: Yes
Q: Do you smile often: Yes
Q: Do you like your hand-writing: Sometimes
Q: Are your toenails painted: Yes
Q: Whose bed other than yours would you rather sleep in: I'm not too picky when it comes to beds.
Q: What colour shirt are you wearing: Grey
Q: What were you doing at 7:00pm yesterday: Sleeping
Q: I can't wait till: That day.
Q: When did you cry last: I don't remember.
Q: Are you a friendly person: For the most part.
Q: Do you have any pets: No

Where is the person you have feelings for right now? In a restaurant somewhere in KL
Did the last person you held hands with mean anything to you now? - Yes
Do you sleep with the TV on? - Not often
What are you doing right now? - Talking to Joy about small poodles.
Have you ever crawled through a window? - No
Can you handle the truth? - I think so?
Are you too forgiving? - Depends on the person.
Are you closer to your mother or father? - Both, but in different ways.
Who was the last person you cried in front of? - My mum?
How many people can you say you've really loved? - It's very hard to count these things.
Do you eat healthy? - I try to.
Do you still have pictures of you & your ex? - Not together.
Have you ever cried because of something someone said to you? - Yes
How often do you go to church? - I'm not Christian
If you're having a bad day, who are you most likely to go to? The people I go to know who they are.
Are you loud or quiet most of the time? - I'm pretty quiet most of the time.
Are you confident? - Sometimes.

5 things I was doing 10 years ago..(1998??!!)

1- I quit the drama club
2-...and became hockey captain
3-I got headbutted in my girly parts during rugby.
4- Making afternoon cartoons part of my daily life.
5- In school, duh.

5 things on my to-do list today

1- Go Fishmarkets
2- Watch Buffy
3- Feed my Nintendogs
4- Correct Joy's English
5- Start a new book

5 snacks I enjoy
1- Red Rock Deli Chips
2- Skittles
3- Chocolate Chip Cookies
4- Kacang Tumbuk
5- Cheese and Strawberry Jam Toast

5 things I would do if I were a billionaire
1- Donate Joy Daniel Wu/Henney
2- Learn how to invest it properly.
3- Buy me a house. With a porch. So I can drink tea on it on those swingy things.
4- Buy my parents another house. If they wanted.
5- Donate a percentage to people who need it.

5 of my bad habits

1- Blowing bubbles with gum.
2- Compulsively chewing gum.
3- Being addicted to video games.
4- Procrastinating
5- Sleeping too much

5 places I have lived in
1- Kuala Lumpur
2- Auckland
3- Hong Kong
4- Sydney
5- Seremban

5 jobs I've had
1- Office gopher
2- Checkout chick
3-
4- -
5- -

I TAG:

MIN LI
HELEN
ANGELA
JOY
AMY

The Asshole Saga Continues

Tue, 15 Apr 2008 06:40:06 GMT

How is it possible that I spent only 1 and a half hours on till today and within that time encounted 3 people worthy of some sort of smackdown? That's an average of over 1 imbecile per hour. Which is almost too much for my brain to handle. So I'm going to appease myself by noting it down, in all their despicable detail, these persons who have aggravated me so.

Imbecile #1 (and the one who really gets the idiot ball rolling)

So let me start of by saying that it is a CONDITION OF ENTRY that you leave your bag at the front of the store or you get it checked on the way out. And since my manager was within a 5 metre radar, I decided to play it safe and ask the guy nicely if they would mind leaving their bag at the store.

Said idiot goes 'I was going to pop in to buy a few things but I'm not going to anymore. I was going to show you my bag on the way out but I'm leaving. What a stupid attitude.' Idiot walks out, and after 2 minutes comes back in. Looks like he decided he wasn't too good for the store after all, so he comes in and says 'I've been shopping here for (sorry was not really paying attention to how long because he mumbles and I don't give a shit) and I've never been asked that. Are you picking on me?' To which I say 'No, really, it's store policy, my manager's just there if you want to take it up with them.' What I really wanted to say was 'Look, MORON. A sign! (That said exactly what I told him: *gasp* Store Policy!) You know how to read those right? Get the fuck over yourself. You're not that important.'

So he's rather emphatically looking for my manager whilst I think rather mean spirited thoughts in my head, and he goes off to buy whatever he thought he could do without initially. So, after coming back, he says 'I swear I've spent $2000 here over the past [whatever amount of time], and I'm not coming back.' Well, hey, Idiot, guess what? I DON'T GIVE A SHIT. Yeah I know that might surprise you seeing how you think you're so godamn important and all that, but yeah, DON'T CARE. You know what I don't understand? People who think they're so fucking important, so much so that you need their patronage. It's a fucking supermarket. You're one in maybe a million customers. Boo fucking hoo! You don't want to shop at our store anymore! Like I said before, GET OVER YOURSELF, you miserable twat. Jesus Christ.

Like I've emphasised before, I'm not an unapproachable person. But, if you come in, and assume that I'm treating you unfairly when I'm just doing my godamn job, I'm going to deal you with the same amount of 'courtesy' that you've treated me with. One asshole deseves another. Especially when I've been up since 6 fucking AM.

Let's move on to Imbecile #2

So Idiot #2 is guilty of wasting my time and my rather short patience (after Idiot #1 above just about hogged all of it) by not properly using their senses and being completely unapologetic about it. Idiot wants to buy some cotton buds, that he thinks are on special. See, if he just used his godamn EYES he would see that the GIGANTIC A4 SIGN says 'COTTON BALLS $1.99'. Now, keep in mind that from where I'm standing, I can't see the section concerning cotton buds/balls. So I scan the buds, and it comes up as $2.49. He thinks I've made a mistake and goes back to check for a few good seconds. I peer over the board normally blocking my view, and, as horrible as my eyesight is, can see that it says cotton BALLS and not BUDS, in less that 2 seconds. I point out the difference and he goes 'er.......'. Yeah, I know, articulate huh. So this is where Imbecile #3 comes in. Imbecile 3 comes to Imbecile #2's resuce and thinks it's his business to let me know what shoddy observational skills I have, even though I tell him I can't see the damn cotton buds. 'Well you should take the ticket down or remove it if you don't have stock. It confuses people.' Well, if people just took the 2 seconds to read a damn ticket that is bigger than your face, they wouldn't get confused would they?! My GOD. How do these people FUNCTION in every day life?!

So, like I said, that was only 1 and a half hours. And work suddenly felt very stifling and full of stupid people after that. Which is why I'm glad I was out of there within the half hour. Sanity intact. Don't know about tomorrow though.

'Forgiveness, is more than saying sorry...'

Mon, 14 Apr 2008 09:35:48 GMT

I may or may not have mentioned in one of my moments of verbal diarrhoea/rage that one of the things that really irritates me is when people have already convinced themselves in their heads about something that happened and give you stick for it, because they really weren't open to any other possibilities of circumstance to begin with, when, in fact, that's not what happened at all. It really drives me fucking nuts.

Actually narrow minded people drive me fucking nuts. But that's a story for another sunny day.

As I was saying, it really makes me wonder WHY you would bother to do things responsibly, or diligently if people were just going to throw it back in your face and shove it up your ass. Hmm. I feel the previously unexpressed sentiments of irrational fury coming back to me, so I suppose this was a long time coming.

As usual, I will not provide details of who these people were, just that they did one hell of a good job of pissing me off. I don't know about other people, but when I do things, I usually do them with good intentions. So when someone exhibits anything that makes me think that what I did was a waste of effort, I will feel like it really was...and that whoever I wasted them on is a Grade A asshole. And you know, looking back on it as a (hopefully) mature person with a sound mind, you will tell yourself, 'Just let it go, it's not a big deal.' But there will always be a part of you that remembers this personal injustice towards you, and you know, that whenever you look at this person, they will not be as you remembered them before. And you also know that things did not have to be this way.

I forgive, but I do not forget.

I've got a secret...

Fri, 09 Nov 2007 17:19:12 GMT

No, actually you do. You with the mismatched chromosomes. Yeah, you, Mr. X&Y. You see, I think there are a few things men don't admit. And they're too shy/ashamed/whatever to tell us. So I'm going to conjecture at what some of these things may be. Maybe we'll be one step closer to figuring out the great puzzle that is BOYS. Or, we could just have a good time laughing at you :)

#1 - We're, like, totally awesome.

The truth is, every guy has an ego, whether they say they do or not. And sometimes, this ego prevents them from admitting that we are the awesome creatures we are. Like when we do things better than they do, they give us concession because we're girls, rather than just admitting we did a super (haha, get it?) job. And sometimes, these concessions lean in our favour. Like when it comes to hauling heavy things around, and we'd rather not develop Madonna biceps. Some would say, 'Why would you let a guy do things for you?' Well, sometimes I like having guys do things for me. Mainly because I'm lazy, and don't like doing heavy lifting. But stroking their egos sometimes doesn't mean they should let their egos get out of hand into thinking we're meek little things with meek little temperaments. NO SIR! And I won't hesitate to serve your order with a side of 'bitch' if you push me around. Like that asshole at the train station. But that's a story for another day.

Let's move on to: #2 - Thinking babies and soft cuddly things are cute. (Because they are.)

See that? That pink? Those big, round, dewy looking eyes? Yes, that's cute. And men won't admit it. But it is. You know, guys with dogs/babies/helpless things is something a lot of girls find attractive. It shows us that you can be responsible for something totally dependent on something else. Which means you're not completely devoid of sentiment and reason. Big plus!

#3 - That you like sappy movies. (possible itsy bitsy spoiler?)

As a general rule, just because it makes you cry, doesn't mean it's a bad movie. Don't be ashamed to shed some tears over Jack and Rose, or Noah and Allie, or Sam and Molly. Love is a beautiful thing. Yes, it is. See, the reason why girls really like these movies is because we all wish we could find our own Jack or Noah or Sam. So guys, take these movie men as your examples and sweep some girl off her feet by giving her your piece of driftwood to float on, or by refurbishing a completely delapidated house for her all by yourself or, by haunting her. Like moths to a flame, guys. Oh yeah.

#4 - That you're really gross and disgusting once left in the company of yourself/other men.

Nose picking, farting, belching, scratching your balls etc etc is all gross. And I think you know that, otherwise you'd be saying things like, 'Honey, I washed my ass with your loofah.' Yikes. I suspect it's probably some prehistoric residue left over from when you were all cavemen, when hygiene wasn't a prerequisite for finding a mate, and when the aforementioned habits were social markers for homosocialism. You know, feeling manly and all that. Which is why you don't like telling us how icky you are. But it's okay, we've accepted it as part of your basic needs. We won't hold much against you for it, for 3 out of 4 weeks of every month.

So maybe this is just the tip of the iceberg, and guys actually have some Pandora's Box thing going on with their deep, dark, and dirty secrets. And if so, I don't really know if I want to know what keeps them ticking, just that I'm content to let them have their secrets, just as we'll have ours.

Sunday, September 16, 2007

Sun, 16 Sep 2007 18:31:11 GMT

When did being able to talk to people become a luxury? Talking without suspicion, or pretense or agenda. Just talking.

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Tue, 15 May 2007 13:46:32 GMT

You may not know or realise it, but you're the biggest, most obtrusive busybody I know. Well it's not entirely your fault, there is someone else who just doesn't have what it takes to keep you in check, but that's where it ends. Everything else is you.

I don't know where to start with you. As well as being a busybody, you are probably the most ridiculous person I know too. Devoid of any sense, any logic sometimes, I can't even believe the extent of your demands. Without giving too much away, let me just state, explicitly and clearly that YOU ARE NOT THE WORLD. But do you exist on this planet? Does your mind occupy this space? This world, where things such as courtesy and reason apply? If I could, I'd personally kick you off that high horse myself. I don't like you anymore. There was a time when I thought you were the best thing that could have happened to someone I know, but not anymore. You are poison. And I'm struggling to find an antidote.

'To put things in perspective.' Is that what you're trying to offer me? Perspective? I don't need your bigoted, prejudiced perspective. You can take that, and all your other pigheaded rubbish somewhere else. I simply don't need it. My life is complicated and busy enough without you, sticking your irritating little head in my affairs.

Do you know the meaning of imposition? That is what you are. An imposition. You know, I tolerate a lot of your bullshit. But I'm sick of it. It is not within your bounds to say everything you have said. I hope you know that. But then again, you probably don't. Given your lack of perspective.

It's not like we never tried talking. I tried talking to you. But it doesn't seem to have done anything. You're still the same, stuck up, scornful, pretentious little person I now know you to be. So don't blame me for never trying. You didn't try hard enough. You are proof to me that people don't change. But you don't want to change anyway. So maybe I was a fool for believing you could.

There is one other thing:

Thank you. For showing me how not to treat people.

Oh, and one more thing (something I've wanted to do for so long): fck you.